I recently experienced my second Celebrants’ Retreat and, like the first a year ago, this was a Heart-Led retreat facilitated by Veronika and Paul Robinson with additional input from experienced celebrant and ordained minister with the Open Sanctuary Angela Maughan. It also happened to be the equivalent week as last year. Otherwise it was a very different experience for me. I am now working as a celebrant; it is easier to manage my time in order to attend continuing professional development such as this and I was able to offer contributions from experience. This retreat was on ‘Beautiful Bereavement Ceremonies’ but far from being sad or depressing it was nourishing (in every possible way) , uplifting and inspirational. As ever, meeting fellow celebrants is interesting; we come from different walks of life, have different beliefs and experiences but a shared interest in continuing to learn about ourselves, others and our craft.
Over the course of the weekend which took place in the stunning Eden Valley we explored a range of bereavement ceremonies from burial and interment of ashes to Living Funerals, undertook listening, writing and voice exercises, discussed the importance of self-care as celebrants and practised creating rituals for bereavement ceremonies. The opportunity to learn from the experience and ideas of others was invaluable as was the direct input of our leaders who have a vast experience of celebrancy both in the UK and further afield. There was time for relaxation and connection with others and the delicious vegetarian food contributed to the experience of nourishment throughout the weekend as did the hot tub!
Travelling back home I found myself thinking about the Death Cafe we experienced at
the beginning of the weekend and wondering how I can offer something along these lines within my community. A Death Cafe is a meeting of people at, not surprisingly, a cafe over tea and cake (the cake is really important!) to discuss death. The purpose is “to increase awareness of death with a view to helping people make the most of their (finite) lives.” (deathcafe.com) In our society death is something of a taboo and many families have little or no conversations about death at all. This can add to their distress when a loved one passes away - they may not know what the deceased person wanted or even what they think about death themselves. Bereaved people often feel isolated, by their experience, of course, but sometimes even more so by their friends' and families’ inability to talk or even to allow them to talk. A Death Cafe seeks to challenge this taboo and provide a space for people to explore their thinking around death. This seems to me to be an exceptionally positive initiative.
Returning to ‘normal’ life is always a challenge after the ‘bubble’ of CPD but invariably I return enriched, inspired and reinvigorated to be not just the best celebrant I can be but also the best version of myself; perhaps they are the same thing? This retreat was no exception; huge thanks to Veronika and Paul Robinson for again sharing their experience, wisdom and love and thanks too to all my fellow celebrants for their openness, acceptance and friendship.
By Catrina Young, Leicestershire Heart-led celebrant, Marking Life’s Moments.
© Hardingstone Ceremonies, March, 2025
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